I am feeling very heavy hearted today. A young woman in my community took her own life a few days ago. While I did not know her, I know many who did and who cherished her as a talented and loving person. So many questions abound and leave the survivors wondering what more they could have done.
In my work as a therapist, I have known many people who have struggled with suicidality. The desire to end one’s own life is a nagging pain that runs terribly deep. It becomes very hard, if not impossible, to imagine a less painful future. Hopelessness becomes the new normal. A suicide attempt can come as a complete shock. Most may not have known how hard someone was struggling to hold it all together until they do something drastic.
A few years ago, a young man I knew took his own life. Our community was stunned. Sure, he had his problems, but things seemed to be improving. We can second guess ourselves all day long about clues to his intentions, but the fact is that he let absolutely no one into his inner turmoil. Survivor guilt is intense and probably never goes away.
If you or someone you know is feeling suicidal, there is help. It may not feel like it right now, but there are people who love you dearly and want to help you. In the depths of despair, it is hard to imagine that things will ever get better. Lean on those around you and borrow some hope for a while if you need to. It is hard to have much perspective when you are feeling so awful, but most things if given time do have a way of working out. Reach out, you will be amazed at how many people care about you and want to help.
Here are some resources for you and your loved ones:
Hang in there please, it gets better. Peace to you.